Image: John William Waterhouse Resonance
Bad Girl Mermaids and Their Fragrances
Part 1 Bad Girls Perfumed Suntan Oils (AKA Bad Girl Mermaid Tail Fragrances)
In honor of all you Bad Girls (and Boys) heading to the beach or the pool over the next few weeks, www.badgirlsperfume.com is dedicating the months of July and August to BAD GIRLS MERMAIDS–tales and tails – from this venerable and most treacherous tradition in Bad Girls Perfume history.
So, dive in, all you Mer-people. It’s time to play!
And who knows? If you’re bad enough to post a comment, offer a tip, or divulge a tale, you might even win one of the excellent Bad Girls mermaid perfumes that will be bobbing along in each week’s tide – all the better to carry off your OWN special Bad Girls Mermaid exploits.
From time immemorial, Bad Girl Mermaids have been calling
men away from firm footing on land to deep water, hidden
shoals, or ever-receding horizons.
In Greek mythology, sirens were creatures with voices of angels,
upper bodies of beautiful women, and the cold hearts of man-eating,
fishlike predators. They sat on rocks and shores and sang so seductively
and compellingly that anyone who heard them was so possessed that
they rushed to certain doom….
Ah yes, much has been written about the songs of Mermaids.
Yet I’m here to tell you that Mermaids’ real power is in their
Homer, of course, omitted any details of mermaid
fragrances in his tales, but it doesn’t take much imagination to
know they would smell like some combination of the tropical
flowers they wore in their hair, the fruits and coconuts that
grew on their islands, and the bracing ozone-y air of breaking
waves. Most importantly, however, the most fascinating and
alluring thing about a mermaid is the animalic, female odor of
her tail. Without her tail or the odor of her tail, the mermaid
loses at least half her power, as we shall see.
In contrast to Homer’s Mermaids who were clearly and
powerfully predatory, the mermaid in Hans Christian Andersen’s
1837 tale, The Little Mermaid is portrayed as being
innocent, sweet, and sometimes even helpful toward men.
I don’t buy this Mermaid “good intentions” interpretation for
one minute. For one thing, anyone with even a cursory
understanding of mermaid physiology is going to know her
intentions would have to be “conflicted” at best, which definitely
qualifies her as a Bad Girl.
The way I see it, we never get a chance to see the true intentions
of Andersen’s little mermaid simply because once on dry land she
has no power to carry them out. You’ll remember that before she
came ashore as a woman, she traded her fragrant mermaid tail for
the much longed for legs of a human. Indeed, without the fragrance
of her tail, Andersen’s “sweet” little Mermaid finds that her
powers of seduction are considerably diminished, and she ultimately
loses all to the treachery of a man guided by human laws.
The moral to this Mermaid’s tale lies in the Mermaid’s tail.
When venturing onto the shores of man, a well-advised Bad Girl Mermaid
should never leave her tail – or at least the fragrance of her tail – behind.
(The full, UNEXPURGATED version of the above
text can be found in the ‘Mermaids’ section of Bad Girls Perfume,
Chapter 6 “Advanced Techniques For Special Prey”.
(available in kindle or paperback editions).
Bad Girls Mermaid Tail Fragrances to the Rescue
Taking cues from mermaid history, numerous perfume brands
have rallied to the Bad Girl Mermaid’s cause by concocting an
abundance of quite effective fragrances to help them achieve
Starting in 1927, Jean Patou created Huile de Chaldée, the
first commercial perfumed suntan oil (AKA Bad Girl Mermaid
Tail Fragrance). Working with perfumer Henri Almeras, Patou loaded
Huile de Chaldée with hot sultry mermaid notes such as tropical
florals, vanilla,and amber.
A single whiff of Huile de Chaldée conjured an abundance of tanned,
oiled, fragrant, and glowing flesh, beaded with droplets of
salt water, exposed in the skimpiest of attire against the most
primal of backdrops − sun, sand, and surf.
Indeed, Huile de Chaldée was so enormously successful that it inspired the
creation of many other suntan oil companies, thus variations on Patou’s
fragrance formula become the signature of beach fragrances
for years to come.
In France, the best-known brand to follow the sun
after Huile de Chaldée was L’Oréal’s Ambre Solaire in 1935,
(now sold under the brand name, Garnier), which like Huile
de Chaldée oozed with the aroma of tropical flowers.
Across the Atlantic, Coppertone captured the coco-nutty appeal of tropical paradises.
Other important North American brands included
Bain de Soleil
Sea and Ski….”
Bad Girls on land and sea were quick to pick up on the vast and seductive power of suntan oils and lotions (AKA Bad Girl Mermaid Tale Fragrances).
For example, the Girl from Ipanema” a child of the 60s, would unquestionably have been deploying the powers of Coppertone, by far the suntan lotion of choice for several decades worth of North and South American Bad Girl Mermaids. Though walking on tall and tan (and young and lovely) human legs, The Girl from Ipanema was clearly a Mermaid, and a very, very Bad Girl Mermaid at that. Having most carelessly aroused the longings and desires of Brazilian musicians Antonio Carlos Jobim and Vinicius de Moraes through the irresistible sillage of her Coppertone, she went on to ignite those same longings and desires of every man on every beach − from here to eternity. Who among us, man or woman, has not been moved by The Girl from Ipanema? The unattainable beach girl. A walking, strolling Mermaid.
Questions for Bad Girl Mermaids to ponder while lolling on the beach or beside the pool:
* What kind of Bad Girl Mermaid are you? Are your intentions good, bad, or ‘conflicted’?
*How is the fragrance or texture of suntan lotion associated with your most cherished Bad Girl Mermaid memories or exploits?
Tell all, Bad Girls. Here’s your chance to slather it on.
We definitely want to hear a bit of tail splashing here!
(Names can be withheld upon request.)
Note: All readers (Bad Girls AND Bad Boys welcome) submitting comments, tales, tips, photos, etc. are eligible to win a 100 ml (3.3Fl Oz) bottles of Jean Patou’s notorious and scandalous Bad Girls Mermaid perfume, Chaldée. First launched in 1927 with the same hot and sensual notes that made Huile de Chaldée a legend in its time, Chaldée was reformulated in 2014 by Jean Patou in-house perfumer, Thomas Fontaine.
Winners will be chosen in a random draw, and the perfume will be mailed later this month.
End of Part 1. Don’t swim off though.
Coming up next:
How Bad Girl Mermaid Beach and Surf Fragrances Helped The Little Mermaid Turn the Tides AND the Tables on The Handsome Prince.
Disclosure : The opinions given in this blog post are my own. They are based on observations I have made as a journalist, blogger, and writer in interviews and store visits over a period of more than 15 years. I also constantly smell fragrances in perfume boutiques and department stores, as well as at trade shows, launch parties, and PR events where I often receive samples and/ or full bottles of fragrances from brands. The samples and full-sized bottles offered to readers of this blog post as ‘give-aways’ have been generously donated by the brands.